Balance. In a nut shell my new year resolutions are simply to find a balance for myself.. No longer having the ability to blame immaturity, no long qualified to be called inexperienced i am just trying to find some balance. Too much of a good thing is a bad thing and its needless to say about bad things. I sit and pondered this one entry as though this words would magically transform my life but i guess life goes on whether or not i choose to make something out of it.
First thing i realised about making resolutions is simply the fact that i do not beleive in them much. To quote a certain friend who is wise beyond her years, if you want to do something just do it dont need a occasion to do something, and i never believed in this much..But i sit and write this resolutions for one reason, to first dosomething you must know wat it is you want....I seemed to have lost the plot and the map to life.. I had a plan i wanted to do, a ambition, a drive all lost in a year..2008 is a year i wish i will forget soon.. While i can concur that this year is going to be a transition year where change occurs and i will struggle alot, i want this year to be a setting stone for my life....
I never believed men were meant to be alone. Social creatures we are but sometime its the socialising that could kill one.. one major reason in my successes were the passion my frens input in me and the kind words to do more than i thought i could, sadly like flies they are all dropping, i have enough fingers to count the number of true friends i have... i need a calculator to count the amount of good friends i have lost...i always advised this to frens when you find almost everyone is against you its maybe not them but you.. if i see it that way i do not really know what i am doing wrong... As old adage goes to to have a friend, be a friend... Maybe i am not being a friend or maybe my variety of flaws make people want to run and hide.. But theres always a silver lining in every instance and in mines its “Prosperity is no just scale; adversity is the only balance to weigh friends.” In this time i saw some true friends shine thru, not many but i still some people struggling to lift me... what has this got to do with resolutions? i am clearing my balance of fair weathered friends, i might have a few close friends but i think its enough for me i have this people close...
“Work, love and play are the great balance wheels of man's being”
Work is crap and i am stuck in a place where the managers lack management skills, they sack people on account of what they see in facebook, the good ones are stuck while the ones that suck up get promoted, the managers play the blame game and take credit for all things else... Colleagues that made me wish i was all alone i wldnt say its my dream job and the distance is a killer but it pays well and i guess it gives me flexibility...my resolution is to start working harder hitting all my incentives, get a tuition job if not start school.. Love, i can write posts after posts but in short i need to balance my emotions...Play, soccer and bike, i need to pick my fitness up, i am 23 but with the fitness of a 32 year old, i need to find the balance between work and play.. A bike is not just a form of transportation but a dream and i have taken the first steps before but to to turn away this time i have to further it..
Problems arise in that one has to find a balance between what people need from you and what you need for yourself”
I guess my life has always been trying to fit in, trying to be the son parents want me to be, trying to appease everyone, i have forgotten the friend thats me, i have neglected my needs, lost things i really wanted for others and i guess its high time i did something for myself, i have alot of hidden wants and needs to fulfill...
Well in short i need balance in my life.. A whole lot of it, i dnt have the means to fight for lost causes anymore. and i want to reserve me for when its necessary.. I predict changes, none wholesale but change nonetheless...
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